Today, I wanted to make a list of things I am thankful for. But this morning, we heard about the terror attacks in Mumbai, India, and all our attention has been diverted since then.

I guess in my simple mind, I will never understand what anyone gets out of terrorizing a society, taking innocent lives and leaving widows / widowers and orphans. Terror breeds terror. Violence sparks revenge and more anger. When will this madness end?

The raw, exposed vulnerability of a society ravaged by terrorism cannot be the answer to what the terrorists want. A lot of violence across the world gets given the name of religion. No religion promotes violence. No religion says it is good to kill on the name of religion. I wish simple sensibility prevailed across the world. I wish…..

I will make my Thanksgiving list, and will start with being thankful for the lives that were spared. I am thankful for the Anti Terror Squad, and the police departments that have been fighting all night to bring the city, the country and the world some peace, while putting their lives at risk.

On matters of personal consequence to me today, I am thankful for:

1) My DH. I am lucky to be with him, and am grateful for him every single day. He has been my rock through all our struggles. He goes with me for EVERY appointment – even if it is a monitoring u/s, or a simple blood draw. He does it so I know he’s in it with me. He loves me through the dump I have become, and still says I look pretty on days when I can’t stand to see my reflection in the mirror. Yes, things have been tough, but there is no other person in the world I would rather face these challenges with. 

2) My pregnancies. I am eternally thankful for having had the blessing of being pregnant, even though for a short lived, fleeting length in time. I am grateful for having known our daughter Aditi, and her siblings who are now with her. We have known and loved them, though we never got the chance to meet them.

3) My parents. Their love and support mean the world to us. Their calm belief in our strength and perseverance keeps us going.

4) My siblings. My brother and his wife, my sister and her husband. They are so loving and caring, even though they don’t quite understand the depths of the darkness IF brings with it.

5) My IRL friends who call me every day to see if I’m ok. My IRL friends who have reached out to us despite the fact that we’ve become crazy people.

6) All you ladies – each and every one of the wonderful women I have “met” in cyberspace. You may not know how much your support and encouragement and comments have helped in moving us along. It’s like your hands hold mine and carry me along some days. I am so very grateful for each of you.

7) My body. Despite everything I have put it through, it bounces back each time, ready for the next haul. It’s here now, waiting for the next IVF to start.

8) I am thankful for Simba. He has literally licked away my tears many many times and has brought a smile on my face when I thought I could not go on any more. He hates to cuddle, but he comes and puts a forepaw in my lap every once in a while, and I know he’s there. ☺

9) Our home, our careers, our education and all material things that make life easy.

10) Technology and advances in medical science that will hopefully help us achieve our dream of having a baby. A few years ago, none of this may have been possible.

11) I am thankful for our spirit and determination. We’ve had a pretty freaky, loopy roller coaster ride so far, but are hanging on – hopefully for a happy ending.